Roller Coaster
So yesterday I just felt terrible. Thank God for young adult group tonight!! God really showed up!!
Yesterday I was feeling really powerless over my own sin, worthless, even wondering if God still loved me. And last night I had an immoral dream to top it all off. I don't know why or how it happened, but it was demonic. Maybe it was in response to the revelation I had gotten about myself as the "Bride of Christ", (as the Bible says). I don't know, all I know is that I was attacked, and God let me go through it. And now he has refreshed me, and I feel back on track.
But that's probably the point. I need to not rely on feelings AT ALL when it comes to my personal identity. It does seem, however, that God will continually let us get to the breaking point, only to refresh us again. I know He does it to bring forth and break the lies and insecurities that we believe and have, as well as to make us stronger in trust of Him, as well as probably another million reasons.
The thing that struck me most tonight from young adults group was what Les said about Jesus asking Peter 3 times if he loved Him. The last time Peter was hurt and said, "Lord, you know I love you". That's right. God DID know that he loved him. And he gave Peter the opportunity to have his own heart revealed and confirmed to himself. Remember, Peter once denied Jesus openly 3 times. God out of his love gave him a chance to reaffirm his faith in Him 3 times. And even though Peter was hurt that He asked- it was a painful thing to go through for many reasons and I'm sure he questioned his own worth and salvation at that point- even though all of this happened Christ never knew Peter as anything but a rock. Amazing. Like Les said tonight, it's ok to have pain and emotional struggle in the Christian walk. In fact, it's healthy!! Jesus didn't enjoy the cross!! He cried out of frustration! (John 11:35) John the Baptist didn't even know who the Savior was until the Spirit rested on Jesus (his cousin!), and then he questioned himself and his life's ministry from prison. (Again, Jesus was loving enough to give him an answer to let him die in peace). And Peter!! THANK GOD FOR PETER!!!! lol!!
God has been setting me up this year. I can see it happening. He is setting me free. Loosing me from fear and strengthening my faith and most importantly, my love relationship with Him.
Thank you, Love.
Yesterday I was feeling really powerless over my own sin, worthless, even wondering if God still loved me. And last night I had an immoral dream to top it all off. I don't know why or how it happened, but it was demonic. Maybe it was in response to the revelation I had gotten about myself as the "Bride of Christ", (as the Bible says). I don't know, all I know is that I was attacked, and God let me go through it. And now he has refreshed me, and I feel back on track.
But that's probably the point. I need to not rely on feelings AT ALL when it comes to my personal identity. It does seem, however, that God will continually let us get to the breaking point, only to refresh us again. I know He does it to bring forth and break the lies and insecurities that we believe and have, as well as to make us stronger in trust of Him, as well as probably another million reasons.
The thing that struck me most tonight from young adults group was what Les said about Jesus asking Peter 3 times if he loved Him. The last time Peter was hurt and said, "Lord, you know I love you". That's right. God DID know that he loved him. And he gave Peter the opportunity to have his own heart revealed and confirmed to himself. Remember, Peter once denied Jesus openly 3 times. God out of his love gave him a chance to reaffirm his faith in Him 3 times. And even though Peter was hurt that He asked- it was a painful thing to go through for many reasons and I'm sure he questioned his own worth and salvation at that point- even though all of this happened Christ never knew Peter as anything but a rock. Amazing. Like Les said tonight, it's ok to have pain and emotional struggle in the Christian walk. In fact, it's healthy!! Jesus didn't enjoy the cross!! He cried out of frustration! (John 11:35) John the Baptist didn't even know who the Savior was until the Spirit rested on Jesus (his cousin!), and then he questioned himself and his life's ministry from prison. (Again, Jesus was loving enough to give him an answer to let him die in peace). And Peter!! THANK GOD FOR PETER!!!! lol!!
God has been setting me up this year. I can see it happening. He is setting me free. Loosing me from fear and strengthening my faith and most importantly, my love relationship with Him.
Thank you, Love.
posted by Justin at
2:25 AM
1 Comments:
Wow, this is really neat Justin!! I won't even try to comment further 'cause that about sums it up, haha jk. So much to ponder, yet it all makes perfect sense. It's the LIVING it that I struggle with. BUT, life is, and always will be, a work in progress. Thank God HE is the one wielding the tools in our lives!! :) Keep the excellent blogs coming...
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